Essential Of Marriage

By PASTOR ED RICE

GOOD SAMARITAN BAPTIST CHURCH

54 MAIN STREET – BOX 99

DRESDEN, NEW YORK 14441

www.gsbaptistchurch.com

In defining the institution of marriage the Bible is specific about some attributes and subtle with others. Forgiveness is a marital essential that the Bible ties directly to our Christianity, but does not attache directly to it's discourse on marriage.

Anyone who has been married for any length of time knows how essential forgiveness is. Anyone who has seen their marriage crumble and fail could give a testimonial about an absence of forgiveness. The Bible gives a command to forgive, a method for forgiveness, and an imperative to forgive.

It says "And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you." (Eph 4:32 ) God gives us example of supreme forgiveness and says in the Old Testament book of Jeremiah ". . . for they shall all know me . . . saith the LORD: for I will forgive their iniquity, and I will remember their sin no more." (Jer 31:34)

The hardest part of your forgiveness will be to 'remember their sin no more'. That is the part of divine forgiveness which we often lack. After a time, when we get into a marital fight we bring up a trespass that was long ago 'forgiven and forgotten.' But it wasn't, if we bring it up again in a later conversation or fight.

Look at what Christ taught about our shallow forgiveness methods, "For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." (Matt 6:14-15)

Complete forgiveness will be challenging to your old nature. If your born again God gives you a new nature wherein you can do all things through Jesus Christ our Lord . . . Even completely forgive.

For your marriage, for your family, examine these four excellent steps to forgiveness.

1. Choose with your free will to forgive. Forgive consciencely and on purpose.

2. Make the promise to lift the burden of guilt from the person as far as the wrong against you is concerned. Remember the person's sin no more - never mentioning it again to the person, to others, or to yourself, even by innuendo.

3. Seal your forgiveness with your behavior, demonstrating love in suitable ways with tenderhearted kindness, and doing what the Bible shows you to be right in the situation.

4. Trust God to allow you to forget and to renew your mind with new attitudes.

What happens when you will not forgive?

1. If you hold on to your resentments, they will turn to bitterness. As a result, your life will be poisoned, and others lives, too "Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled;" (Heb 12:15)

2. By refusing to release the burden of the other person's wrong against you and choosing to carry that burden yourself, you will become crippled in the living of your life. "And make straight paths for your feet, lest that which is lame be turned out of the way; but let it rather be healed. Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord: (Heb 12:13-14)

3. If your are not willing to forgive, (and forget), there is no way you can expect to walk in personal fellowship with God. "So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses. " (Matt 18:35) V